Need to Be Needed

Too often we let ourselves be led blindly by the need to be needed and it's a painful condition to be led by. I suppose that wouldn't be so bad if the needing to be needed wasn't so consuming that we forget the simple things like having boundaries, or commanding respect, or not allowing people to treat us like punching bags or trash receptacles. Because - that's what happens. First you give up yourself, and then you end up taking on other people's garbage, all because of this mostly subconscious desire to be needed, to be loved, to liked, to be cherished, to be appreciated has taken over your very being.

People can never give you all that, you know. And beyond the fact that they can't, when we let subconscious desire take over, we lose our conscious self. Consciousness dictates really appropriate boundaries. Subconscious steps all over them. Consciousness dictates really appropriate manners of being addressed, being treated, being loved. Subconscious obliterates them.

What is it that you want? Because when it comes down to it, we are the ones who have to choose whether we will let someone walk all over us, treat us badly, spew their anger at us, or whatever, all for the sake of being needed, being desired, being wanted - and where's that at?

It's a choice between being driven by the subconscious or being driven by the conscious. What is it really worth to you to be needed? If being treated poorly is a part of that formula, you need to check and see whether your need to be needed is being driven by your subconscious or your conscious and then decide if it's what you really want.

The need to be needed is a reminder of the sacred union between your soul and God. Life is too short to engage in friendships or other relationships that in any way compromise the grace of your soul. Nothing is worth a compromise of that magnitude. And honestly - there's a lot of goodness out there that needs you. If you need to be needed, you can find a thousand causes to dedicate your kind efforts to without ever having to compromise the grace of your soul. And when you leave that need out of your friendships and relationships, you are in a space where you can love freely, serve freely and never be compromised.



Blessings.
- Darshan






© 2010 Darshan F Jessop