A Street With Trees

How many things do you do in such a way so as not to remind yourself of something bad in the past? Kind of like, I don't drive down that street (I drive 4 miles out of the way) because it reminds me of one time when I was a kid and an apple fell out of the tree on a street that had a tree like that and the apple bonked me on the head and it hurt...

That sounds funny enough, but actually, the majority of us spend a lot of time and a lot of energy expended on avoiding things that remind us of times in our lives when we felt pain. This avoidance tactic is admirable in effort, but ineffective! Every time you avoid driving down the street, you are expending energy, putting time and effort into and ruminating on that time of pain. You're bringing it to the forefront, rather than avoiding it. You're bringing the pain up to speed so that it's with you now, instead of just being something that was a part of a long ago past.

We don't even think about behavior like this, we just set up a whole regimen of actions and habits. We think they are reasonable, even if we are driving 4 miles out of the way!, because they are habits and we think they work. Should you never enjoy streets with trees again? How many streets would you need to avoid for that??? How much of life would you miss??

We spend our lives trying to avoid remembering pain, but we end up setting ourselves up for more, so use reverse pyschology. Pain of the past is gone, only your memories of it remain. It's attachment to those memories of pain that keeps you in a condition of constant pain. Bring it up, feel the pain of it, and let it go. Leave the past where it was and honor the moment by seeing it as a stand alone, completely separate from the distant past. Get present and see the current moment for what it is, a street with trees.

Blessings.
- Darshan

© Darshan F Jessop