The risk it takes to blossom

I came across a quote today that made me so very happy:

"...and then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." anais nin

Yes, yes, yes, we hold everything inside, always seeking a perfect place where there can be no pain, and yet in that very place, pain becomes starkest. There is no perfect place. There is no place where there isn't the possibility of pain. It's a risk of everyday life. And not to risk is to risk the most painful of lives, the life lived knowing you are really not alive at all.

There is nothing we can do that is perfect enough to protect us or those we love from pain. You can be a perfect mother, or a perfect father. You can do everything exactly the way you are supposed to do it, and one day you wake up and your child has some horrible disease, or your child has killed himself, or something else has happened. You can do everything exactly the way you are supposed to in order to be the most perfect partner, but love has it's own agenda and it centers more on courage than perfection.

The point is - you can go by the rules and do everything you are supposed to do and you still risk pain. There is no protection from it. But there is relief.

Pain is a feeling and feelings are fleeting. It is said by almost every mother that the pain of childbirth is unbearable and yet women bear children again and again. We are quite capable as human beings to endure great pain because when it stops, it is gone, and we only have a memory of it.

Granted, the memory is a hard thing to deal with, but it is the key. If we can remember that pain goes away, we can train ourselves not to tense up in fear of it. It may come, it may not, but for sure we will know that it will pass, just as all feelings do. It is too, too painful to be tight in a bud our entire lives, for fear of something that is fleeting. The risk it takes to blossom, is the risk of knowing that no matter what, a feeling will pass. New feelings will come and then newer feelings, and then newer, newer feelings.

The risk it takes to blossom is worth it - it is arms opening wide and embracing all of life. There is nothing more glorious.

Blessings.
- Darshan

© 2008 Darshan F Jessop